IN love WITH love

Just last saturday i was watching my friend's loaned "Amazing Stories" DVDs by Steven Spielberg. When i came to the 'Guilt Trip' episode, i was sure i've seen this a long long time ago in a forgotten place. Or easier said, i forgot la when and where exactly i watched this. But definitely a long long time ago.

Just so happened that i wanted to write something inspired by that particular episode before my memory of it was pleasently refreshed. The episode was about the various emotions of mankind taking form of human beings and going around completing their jobs, quite vocal about it too. And in this scene we have our round and jolly Guilt with a striking resemblance to the late Pavarotti and Love, a confident attractive lady with dirty-blonde hair. I am guessing this scene was set in the late 80s or early 90s so you should let your fashion visualizations be more, em, yuppie-like, i suppose.

So the story goes, Guilt falls in love with Love but Love doubts Guilt loves her as an individual. Guilt may have just fallen in love with the act of loving itself intstead of our Miss Love. Do take a few moments to digest that sentence please. It's no use continuing to read if you didn't get that. *** So then, i just had to reflect my previous relationships to analyze if i may have developed the same syndrome as Mr. Guilt.

It is a known fact, at least for me, that i always thought i've had this 'bad-boy' syndrome (to be refered as BBS from this point). You know, where some women find some exciting attraction to 'bad-boys' for their dangerously rebellious attitudes, so to speak. So, i tried to remember (it's not as bad as it sounds) past experiences with old boyfriends and how i really felt. I have a feeling that this BBS has a slightly deeper reason than just, "exciting attraction for dangerously rebellious attitudes" or worse, for fun. I considered the Guilt syndrome, where loving someone, particularly someone perhaps a little more difficult to love, gives one a sense of twisted deed made for conquest. Yes, i suppose it sounds horrible at first. Then, the attempt of justification for the beneficial-half of the relationship helps sugar-coat the bitterness, for a while. Oh God, i feel a little disgusted with myself. I cannot, however, deny that while i did not notice at that point, may have just let that happen before. Well, at least i understand now. *Sigh*

Good to say that had passed and i shan't be allowing that to happen anymore. I do want to keep my intentions as genuine as possible, especially with Love and Guilt going off making unfatomable babies.